Oleh Much. Khoiri
SIAPAKAH yang disebut sebagai teman dalam hidup kita? Kebanyakan kita memaknai teman sebagai orang lain yang mau merasakan apa yang kita rasakan, memikirkan apa yang kita pikirkan, dan mengalami apa yang kita alami. Sebaliknya, ada juga yang lebih ekstrim, teman itu hanya kita dapati di meja makan, lalu pergi ketika kita sedang kelaparan.
Namun, jika direnungkan lebih dalam, hakikatnya “a friend in need is a friend indeed.”—teman yang sesungguhnya adalah teman ketika saling membutuhkan. Justru “saling membutuhkan” itulah yang mengikat satu sama lain. Ketika satu membutuhkan, sementara yang tidak, pertemanan bisa menjauh atau bahkan terabaikan.

Bersama peserta workshop penulisan pada kopdar RVL Yogyakarta. Foto: Dok Pribadi
Saya punya teman dekat sewaktu bersekolah di tingkat SMP, kebetulan itu putra bu guru dari ibu saya. Pertemanan itu berlanjut di SMA, bahkan sewaktu sama-sama kuliah tahun 1985-an. Waktu dekat, kami saling membutuhkan, dan karena itu kami teman yang dekat dan baik. Ketika sama-sama kuliah, ketika ada orang lain mengisi hari-hari saya dan juga hari-hari dia, pertemanan kami tidak seakrab dulu. Jarak Jember dan Surabaya telah memisahkan kami, seakan kami tidak saling membutuhkan. Tentu saja posisi teman telah digeser oleh teman-teman kuliah masing-masing.
Kali ini saya juga menjalin pertemanan dengan orang-orang hebat, yakni teman-teman penulis dari berbagai komunitas, termasuk Rumah Virus Literasi (RVL). Mereka berkomunikasi lewat grup WhatsApp, saling memberi respons terhadap tulisan yang di-posting, saling memberikan saran, dan saling melengkapi. Secara hakikat, inilah teman-teman baru saya. Mereka-lah yang memberi saya warna hidup, menghangatkan, menyejukkan, dan mensuasanakan saya dalam dunia nyata dan dinamis.
Sementara itu, saya terpaksa perlu “menyisihkan” teman-teman terdahulu yang saat ini tidak memberikan manfaat tertentu untuk pengembangan diri saya—bukan berarti saya melupakan mereka. Mereka ada di dalam hati, memang. Namun, karena jarak ruang dan waktu, kami seakan teramat jauh. Toh, kenyataannya, mustahil bagi saya untuk mengingat mereka setiap saat, terkecuali ketika saya atau teman membutuhkan satu sama lain.
Saya tentu selalu berdoa agar dijauhkan dari teman yang berbalik hati, dari baik ke jahat. Kok bisa? Manusia tidak bisa melawan takdir, bahwa Tuhan itu Maha Kuasa untuk membolak-balikkan hati. Sebab itu, dalam doa, kita menyebut asma Tuhan dengan “Ya Muqallibal qulub” (Wahai Dzat yang membolak-balikkan hati). Meski manusia selelau berharap punya teman yang baik hati, tetapi jika Tuhan membolak-balikkan hatinya, lantas mau apa?
Dalam banyak kasus, orang yang paling dekat dengan kita, dia tahu paling banyak tentang kita, dan berpotensi paling besar untuk berbuat baik atau buruk bagi kita. Untuk yang baik-baik, jelaslah. Namun, hal buruk pun bisa terjadi. Raja Jayakatwang tewas di tangan Ken Arok, seseorang yang sangat tahu tentang sang Raja. Konon, wafatnya Soekarno juga berkaitan dengan penyusupan dokter CIA yang diskenario oleh “orang dekat” presiden pertama RI itu.
Jangankan orang lain, kekasih kita saja akan menjadi ancaman besar bagi kita selagi di hatinya ada niat buruk. Bisa saja dia menikam suatu saat kelak, karena dia tahu betul apa dan siapa diri kita. Itu berlaku bagi kekasih yang tidak punya cinta tulus dan lapang hati—bisa jadi cintanya dilengketi kerakusan. Sebaliknya, jika di hatinya ada niat baik, kekasih adalah bidadari yang bersemayam di taman hati.
Begitulah, saya tidak ragu lagi untuk “memeluk” pandangan filosofis di atas. Setidaknya dalam konteks kekinian saya merasa nyaman dengan pandangan tersebut. Saya benar-benar memerlukan orang-orang yang mendukung saya untuk mengembangkan RVL—yakni mereka yang berkomitmen dan berintegritas militan. Impian membesarkan RVL benar-benar membara, namun saya perlu manusia-manusia pilihan untuk “membakar” bara itu agar semakin berkobar dan mengantarkan impian menjadi kenyataan.
Teman-teman RVL termasuk orang yang memenuh “kriteria” teman yang telah saya tetapkan. Saya tidak bertepuk sebelah tangan. Saya memerlukan mereka; dan mereka juga memerlukan saya. Impian kami beririsan atau bersesuaian. Terlebih sejak kopdar RVL pertama di Yogyakarta, 21-23 Oktober 2022 silam, kehadiran teman-teman RVL terasa semakin mendalam.
Memang ada teman yang masih menyebabkan aora negatif, yang bisa menguras pikiran, energi, dan perasaan. Namun, saya hanya berdoa agar mereka segera mendapatkan hidayah. Saya lebih fokus pada teman-teman baru yang tulus dan selalu berpikir positif. Karena itu, kehadiran teman-teman baru adalah anugerah luar biasa, yang bakal selalu memberikan aora positif, mencerahkan, dan mempelangikan hidup saya.
Sungguh, saya ingin menjadi manusia dengan jiwa yang sehat, yang tampak dari kebahagiaan hati, mengingat bahwa hati adalah jendela jiwa. Dengan berteman dengan orang-orang positif, dan bekerja bersama mereka, dengan lingkungan yang positif dan sehat, impian kerja saya dan impian jiwa saya akan terwujud. Teman yang baik akan menjadi pemulih jiwa yang kurang sehat.
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Gresik, 21/11/2022
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Siap. Betul sekali Bah. Hanya teman yg bersinergi positif, saling mendukung dan mengingatkan untuk mencapai tujuan yg mulia yg kita kembangkan dan kita jalankan yg kita openi. Sementara teman yang kurang mendukung dan tidak bersinergi biarlah mencari jalannya sendiri.
Teman itu akan selalu ada ketika kita membutuhkan, dan kita juga ada krtika dia membutuhkan kita. Matur nuwun, Abah Inin.
Jadi haru membacanya. Insya Allah semoga bisa dibuktikan bhw kita semua adalah teman sejati dlm memajukan RVL
Mampu memberi aora positif, mencerahkan dan mempelangikan hidup penulis yg betkumpul dibawah atap RVL. Sehat dan berlimpah berkah Master Emcho. Kami doakan 🤲🤲🤲
Terima kasih, Mbakyu. Tanggapan ini sangat bagus, terlebih ada doa yang diselipkan. Semoga Allah merahmati kita sekalian. Aamiin
Setuju Abah….Abah sudah berjuang sesuai dengan dimilikinya, bahkan secara maksimal mampu mewujudkan bersama orang-orang yang berpikir positip. Perjuangannya penuh inspirasi. Lanjut Abah , dimana ada tekad disana ada jalan. Semoga semua rencana berjalan lancar. Aamiin
Terima kasih banyak atas dukungan dan partisipasi Pak Hariyanto. Sungguh sangat berharga.
Alhamdulillah…saya bersyukur sekali berada Di komunitas ini. Berada ditengah2 pribadi yang selalu berpikir positif. Terima kasih Master
Terima kasih, Bu Ayu. Kita akan terus berpikiran positif, dan saling mendukung.
Idem Master Emcho. Alhamdulillah Teman-teman di RVL menghangatkan dan sekaligus menyejukkan. Saling menyapa, menghargai dan menasihati. Setidaknya lewat tulisan. Dan biasanya tulisan penulis RVL tidak “abal-abal”. Karena sebelum menulis biasanya mereka membaca buku bermutu. Sehingga mereka pun menghasilkan tulisan yang bermutu.
Beda dengan teman-teman pada umumnya. Apalagi jika mereka tak suka membaca dan menulis. Mereka begitu mudahnya mencomot postingan-postingan yang penulisnya tak jelas dan kontennya yang sepertinya Islami/menasihati tetapi sesungguhnya mencela orang yang berbeda pemahaman.
Terima kasih atas pencerahan panjenengan. Semoga Allah ta’ala menjaga ukhuwah kita hingga ke surga. Aamiin Yaa Robbal’alamin
Aamiin barakallah, terima kasih Bu Sita. Kita membaca dan menulis utk memperjuangkan kebaikan, dan caranya juga harus penuh kebaikan
Benar sekali, di HP kita banyak grup yg sebenarnya kurang baik untuk dipertahankan. Tidak memberikan dukungan.
Kita hidupkan yang benar2 bermanfaat dan memperkaya jiwa dan pikiran kita. Saya kira begitu ya
Alhamdulillah, Keberadaan Master Emcho di RVL memberi suasana akrab dan menyejukkan. Kehadiran beliau di whatsapp atau di media lainnya. Selalu mengajak, mengingatkan, memotivasi, dan memberi nutrisi otak. Setiap peristiwa sehari-hari bahkan yang tidak pernah dipikirkan orang lain sekalipun dikemas menjadi ide menarik dalam bentuk tulisan yang menarik. Termasuk topik artikel kali ini yang mengangkat tentang TEMAN. Sungguh sangat membuka pikiran saya untuk flash back tentang per-teman-an yang pernah saya jalin mulai lahir sampai usia senja. Saya benar benar ingin meneteskan air mata. Trenyuh. Mengapa tidak. Selama ini saya tidak pernah memaknai pertemanan secara mendalam. Dari sisi positif dan negatif nya. Dari sisi kebermanfaatan sampai sisi mudhorotnya. Saya merasa sebagai sosok yang egois. Hari ini setelah saya membaca artikel thoughts on “A Friend in Need Is a Friend Indeed”. Serasa ada hembusan semilir angin lembut menghapus keegoisan saya.
Tanggapan yang sangat bagus dan bisa menghadirkan inspirasi baru. Mudah2an kita diberi keringanan hati utk memaknai pertemanan dengan bijak. Matur nuwun, Bu guru.
Alhamdulillah, terimakasih, Pak. Benar sekali, teman bukan berarti yang paling dekat. Kecuali pakar makan tanaman, tidak saling membutuhkan.
Pagar makan tanaman. Itu memang ada. Itu bukan teman sejati namanya. Ia teman yang berkhianat.
A friend in need is a friend indeed, pemahaman yang utuh dan universitas dari seorang pendekar literasi. Tulisannya mengggugah dan menggerakkan.
Kita semua akan menjadi pendekar literasi ya, Pak. Tapi kita memang harus terus belajar dan memperbaiki diri.
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As is commonly believed, the actions of representatives of the opposition are associated with industries! Being just part of the overall picture, representatives of modern social reserves only add fractional disagreements and are represented in an extremely positive light.
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